It takes strength to admit we are wrong
- Amber Miller: A Word of Truth
- July 2, 2018
- 2057
When I was younger, the television show “Happy Days” used to be my favorite because of the era it portrayed. Although it was filmed in the ‘70s and ‘80s, it was based on the ‘50s and ‘60s, a time frame that seemed idyllic to me because of its slower pace and simpler lifestyle.
One of the main characters was a macho biker guy named Arthur Fonzarelli, otherwise known as “Fonzie.”
I remember it was hard for Fonzie to admit when he was wrong. He would start to say it, but that word “wrong” just took awhile to flow from his tongue. He would say, “I was wr. I was wr. I was wrong.” Although it was painful for him to admit, I think he felt much better after he did.
I share that story to bring up this point: Why is it so hard for people to admit their mistakes? Are we so insecure with ourselves that we can’t admit if we mess up?
In today’s culture there is an ever-increasing trend of blaming others for our own mistakes. People break the law left and right, but somehow it is someone else’s fault. It would be ridiculous for me to be caught speeding and then blame the police officer who stopped me and gave me a ticket. There is a law, and he is simply enforcing it. Why should I think the law should change for me?
None of us are perfect, and although it may be our natural tendency to want to pass the blame when we mess up, true growth happens when we lay aside our pride and simply admit we were wr ... wr … wrong.
Proverbs 28:25 says, “He who is of a proud heart stirs up strife, but he who trusts in the Lord will be prospered.”
How many fights could be dissolved or never started if we simply admit we are wrong? If you have trouble admitting your mistakes, not only are you going to live a life causing strife wherever you go, but also it will hinder your prosperity because proud people trust in themselves, not God.
James 4:6 says, “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” When we admit we are wrong, we are confessing that maybe, just maybe, we don’t know it all and need to rely on God to show us the way.
There needs to be a healthy balance though in admitting a wrong without falling into condemnation. I tend to lean toward easily admitting to someone when I have wronged them but then beating myself up over it, and that isn’t good either. The correct thing would be to own up to a mistake and receive God’s forgiveness for it so you don’t have to walk around beating yourself up.
Knowing that God has already provided forgiveness for me over 2,000 years ago through Jesus, that he is not holding my sin against me (Romans 4:7-8) and that there is no condemnation in Christ (Romans 8:1) has helped me immensely in this area, but I still have to renew my mind to those truths repeatedly.
In closing I want to use my sons’ friend Kory as an example. I mentioned him in a column a few weeks ago. He was at our house the other day, and I was again impressed with the character of this boy.
I was working in the garden, so I could hear what was going on as Kory, my boys and a couple other boys were playing baseball in our yard. There have been a lot of different boys coming over to play the past month or so, and there is usually a lot of bickering that goes on (my boys included).
“You’re out!” “No I’m not!” “Why didn’t you catch it?” “It’s not my fault.” And so on and so forth.
You get competitive boys together where they all want to win, and their emotions tend to take over. But Kory wasn’t like that. He was competitive, yes, but if there was a play that was close, instead of fighting to get his way, he freely admitted if he was out or if the other kid was safe. If he made a mistake, I could hear him say, “My bad guys, I should have had that,” instead of trying to pass the buck on to others.
It was like such a breath of fresh air.
Can we all just learn a powerful lesson from this 10 year old and admit when we are wrong?
Let’s lay aside our pride and own up to our mistakes. It will position us to be able to receive God’s grace and to be used by him to positively affect those around us.