It’s always better to have a plan and some courage
- col-teri-stein
- March 7, 2025
- 659
Joe and I were having a quiet, uneventful evening at home when I received a panicked phone call from my sister-in-law, who I’ll call Shannon, because that’s her name. Shannon was home alone, which is usually not a problem.
The problem is we all live in old houses in our neighborhood, and you know what that means — it’s easier for critters and bats to get in. Over the decades little openings can happen. Did you know bats can squeeze through a small hole about the size of a quarter? I bet the bat that was flying around Shannon’s living room knew that information.
Joe and I headed to the rescue. We found Shannon cowering under a blanket. Her dog Obi-Wan Kenobi, a Shih Tzu/Poodle mix, was unfazed. That bat didn’t bother him a bit.
Joe looked around for the bat, which had disappeared before we got there. I checked a window curtain for signs of the bat. It was all false bravado. If I had found the bat, I knew Joe would come to my rescue and get it. After a whole house search, which turned up no bat, Joe decided to head back to our house.
I stayed; I did not want my sister-in-law to have to sit around the house alone with a bat in there. Besides, the bat was gone. It surely wouldn’t come back.
Then about a half-hour later, Shannon and I are in the middle of a good chat when the dreaded creature returns, his large dark wings flapping through the air as he flies in circles from the living room to the kitchen to the dining room. Obi couldn’t care less about the situation.
Shannon threw the blanket back over her head. Then I discovered I’m no help at all. There happened to be another blanket right where I was sitting, and I threw it over my head. We started screaming like girls.
With no plan of our own, I posted our dilemma on the family social media page. “Get a tennis racket,” one person suggested.
“All we have is a clothes basket and a Swiffer,” I replied.
OK, it was a long-handled Swiffer, and we also had a towel and a pair of work gloves but no courage or knowledge of bat-removal techniques. We were woefully unprepared.
Shannon was waving the Swiffer in the air, which was more than I was doing. It seems I am blessed with the ability to scream uncontrollably at each bat sighting. It was not a huge help. In the meantime Obi is freaked out by all this screaming and disappears upstairs. The bat disappears again too.
As in any crisis, we tried to keep our sense of humor. It was all we had.
I’m happy to report our nonplan worked. The bat disappeared to parts unknown, and at press time, he has not been seen again.
But what should we have done? The internet is full of helpful bat-removal ideas. Apparently, there is no need to cover your head because bats are “precision navigators.” They will not run into you on purpose. But what if they are having a bad night and their navigation is off. I don’t want to take the chance.
Good thing we didn’t use the towel we had because bats can get their little claws stuck in the material, leading to another problem. Just be careful because a bat can bite through one or two layers of material if you try to pick them up. No, I’m not doing the trap the bat in a sturdy container method either.
The bat-removal method I liked best was to the let the bat find its own way out. You open as many doors and windows as you can and turn off lights inside your home. They will navigate their little selves right out of your house. We don’t want to hurt them because bats are good. They eat insects and mosquitoes that bug us.
So now I’m more prepared. And if a bat shows up again, the go-to plan is to move to a new home.