When I sit down and watch the Outdoor Channel with my dadwhich I have done on a semi-regular basis in the pastI never see squirrel hunters.
The staples include guys on little speedboats, motoring down a twisting river with three or four fishing lines trailing them. Or the guys with black and green grease paint all over their faces crouching in little tree stands and gaping with awe at massive bucks.
But there are never any guys after squirrels.
So when I heard that squirrel hunters exist, I was slightly confused, but mostly hoping the scenarios would play out something like Captain Ahab and the White Whale.
Guy chases squirrel. Squirrel eludes guy and taunts him. Guy hunts down squirrel again only to lose him down a hole seconds before closing in. You get the picture.
A more comedic scenario would play out something like Bill Murray chasing the gopher in Caddyshack. He was always one step behind.
But I do actually know a squirrel hunter. To look at him you would never know it, and he even admits to not being a prime example.
He assures me he doesnt just chase onehe hasnt shot one yetbut Im skeptical. According to him, the sport is a lot of sitting around on the porch and waiting for opportunity to present itself.
Although it doesnt seem quite the same, I guess waiting around for an opportunity is something fisherman and deer hunters both do. Theres probably a lot less glory in bringing home a small squirrel for supper, though.
Someday Im sure hell tell me all about The Big One That Got Away, and I truly am eager to hear the story.
Besides, its not every day you meet a squirrel hunter.
But until then, Ill just have to imagine what I think squirrel hunting must be like.
As does my imagination with most things, it will probably get the better of me. When I find out the facts, I might be slightly disappointedthis once happened with Big Muskie Bucket and I still havent fully recovered.
Heres to hoping the imagined story is just as good as the facts.
Do you know a squirrel hunter? Do you have any stories of The Big One? Want a guest on one of your hunts? Let me know at lbrown@gpubs.com.
