Studying to be silent
- Michelle Wood: SWCD
- October 22, 2009
- 821
Try a tree stand with a button buck strolling by. Don’t have that situation at hand? Well, there are other possibilities.
On a recent visit to the woods, our boys were having difficulty staying in place and avoiding conversation. They were enjoying the colorful leaves and got a thrill when a pileated woodpecker landed in the tree beside us, but silence just didn’t seem to be in them.
We have a roomy permanent stand with a short surrounding wall, so total immobility was not required to get game to come near. Voices, however, have a tendency to travel and warn wildlife to stay away.
To my amazement, a young buck decided to travel our way. To my greater astonishment, the boys became instantly silent and still.
Each boy had a camera in hand and carefully clicked away. The deer had no idea we were above during his 20 minute photo shoot.
“Wow,” I thought, “if I could just turn this effect on at home!”
I don’t think it is unusual for kids to make noise and move. In fact, I think it is generally great for them. After all, we construct all sorts of activities to keep our “electronic age” kids in shape.
I also consider conversation a great way to learn. The art of pondering concepts and questioning them further gets minds of all ages working in high gear.
But, there are times that call for kids to stay quiet and remain still. The question is how we help them develop such skills.
To start, we need to think about our own habits. When I started watching for deer from a tree stand, I couldn’t sit without fidgeting for more than an hour or so. However, time, practice and planning soon improved my abilities.
We know when we want our kids to sit quietly, but sometimes we don’t think about it as a skill that needs to be learned. To have kids that sit calmly, we need to help them practice when the outcome isn’t critical.
If you have one or more kids that you fear will explode if not permitted to talk, start in small steps.
Point out a clock and ask the child not to say anything for five minutes. For very young kids, you may have to go for just two. As the child improves, lengthen the time by a minute or two.
You may want to give the child a small toy or a picture to color to keep her occupied while she concentrates on not talking.
Our boys do best, most of the time, with paper and pencil available. At times, they will get so involved in drawing or writing a story that quietness comes naturally.
Teaching children to really ponder what surrounds them will help them to remain quiet and silent.
To continue with the outdoor example, when children learn to really look and study various leaf colors and shapes, more stillness results. The reward of wildlife coming near encourages them.
Try bringing the child’s attention back to an observation or a project when his mind strays and his mouth starts to open. The practice will help him to quiet his mind and apply himself.
If you have the opportunity to plan ahead, give the kids time to run around and make noise before they need to settle down. Dispelling some of the pent-up energy may make quieter behavior easier.
That is where I made my mistake in the woods. A schedule mix-up left our kids without run around time before we got in the stand.
Don’t wait for a big event like a wedding and just hope your kids will be quiet. Practice ahead of time so kids will have strategies for being quiet.
Kids certainly need to run around and be boisterous. That is part of the fun of being a kid. But studying to be quiet, to be still, and to concentrate will also help them in innumerable ways, from seeing wildlife to focusing on school assignments.
Our piano teacher reminds the boys and me that we need to practice, practice, practice to be better musicians. In the same way, we need to practice to be quiet.
Karen Wilson invites comments at wilsonfamilycorner@yahoo.com.