10 steps toward happiness

  • By Angela Workman
  • August 20, 2012
  • 350
                        
Summary: Angela blogs about 10 ways to ensure a happier life. Every person has an individualized, unique recipe for happiness. It’s easy for it to get off balance, but with attention and effort, anyone can achieve a personal sense of joy and fulfillment. What I’ve found is that a lot of people don’t really know what would make them happy. Others do know, but feel ill equipped to actually bring those elements to life. They may know the ingredients to the happiness, but the metaphorical oven and stovetop are missing. Still, others have what brings them fulfillment, but struggle to keep it all balanced in a way that achieves the greatest joy. To begin, let’s start with the basics. As in basic needs. Those are necessary to achieve pleasure. Food, shelter, health and safety are like the eggs and milk to that dessert you’re whipping up. Secondly, faith, spirituality and work fill out the bulk of the recipe. Hobbies and interests are the icing on the cake. Sounds relatively simple, right? Not so much. Ever put too much oil in your cake recipe? I have. Ever left out an egg while baking cookies? I’ve done that, too. Even the slightest imbalance leaves something askew in this recipe we call happiness—aim to strike the right equilibrium for your life. To do this, you have to really consider what would bring you happiness and how you can actually get there. I have devised a list of what I think is important for a generally happy life in no particular order. Every person’s list differs, but I think most of us can relate to all ten of these ideas to some capacity. The list will look familiar—they are fairly obvious—but often forgotten in the midst of our hectic lives. 1. Relationships: Surround yourself with people you love and eat up the positive energy they offer. Don’t skimp out on time with friends or family members who offer positivity—they are crucial to your wellbeing. As discussed in previous blogs, marriages and intimate relationships require work. If something in your marriage is off, fix it. Reinvest in the magic that sparked the first date. Make time as a couple. If relationships suffer, it is difficult to feel a great sense of happiness. 2. Engulf yourself in hobbies. Invest in what you love to do. I know people who can’t list even one hobby or interest—their lives are so consumed by work or children, that they’ve lost sight of personal interests. Spend time participating in what you enjoy, whether it be scrapbooking, reading, exercise or cooking. Determining how much of the hobby you need in your life will be a personal appraisal—but pay attention to how you feel when you’re done. Refreshed? Ready to take on work? Relieved? Relaxed? Peaceful? Use these as a guide or a gauge for how much you require. If you’re one of those who have no idea what you like, that’s not a bad place to be. Consider what you enjoyed doing as a child, try a friend’s hobby or jump into something brand new—you won’t regret it. 3. When choosing work, do what you love to do. Now, that’s pretty idealistic and not an option for everyone. However, if it is an option, go for it. Love helping others? Try a career in a helping profession. Love to cook or bake? Consider something in the culinary arts. A rewarding, satisfying career is like a surprise mountain of frosting inside of the chocolate cake. Didn’t expect it, but it’s delicious. Now, if a career switch isn’t in the cards, an adjustment of perception may be in order. Instead of focusing on what you don’t like about your job, consider what you do like. Are you friends with a few coworkers? Do you appreciate the hours? Is your job a stepping stone to something bigger? Likewise, even if you aren’t in a position to switch careers, there may still be opportunities for enrichment. There are plenty of schools that offer light courses that may spark your interest. They aren’t as demanding as returning to school full time, but may satisfy the cravings for something more. 4. Spirituality and faith allow you to find meaning in the world. Whether it’s through reading the Bible, meditation or prayer, find a way to achieve inner peace. Structuring five minutes of prayer each night can work wonders. Consider joining a church, discovering a bible study or simply spending time talking to others with similar faiths. Visit a friend’s church to make the trip less intimidating. 5. Spend more time with pets. I wouldn’t have listed this one a little over a year ago, but pets really do have that kind of power. They comfort after a long day. A dog or a cat can distract you from stress or anxiety of work or personal problems. 6. Engage in plenty of self-care activities. Do lots of nothing whenever possible. Don’t clean. Don’t work. Do just what relaxes you. Give yourself a manicure or a pedicure. Take a hot bubble bath. Read a book. Fall asleep to a movie. 7. Spend time reflecting on or writing down what is going well in your life. It sounds a bit silly—but we often forgot what we have right now, in the moment. Rather, we don’t realize how much we like our jobs or appreciate our abilities until we no longer have them. Do a quick audit of your life and you’ll probably find it’s not so bad. In fact, you may find that it’s better than you realized. 8. Exercise and eat right. Yes, this one is dreaded by us all and often not abided by. Especially by me. After all, I’m using baking as a metaphor here. The consequence that these two have on our moods is quite palpable, however. They are choices we can make, control we do have in our lives. If we don’t have our health and wellness, it’s very difficult to build a platform of joy in our lives. 9. Don’t sweat the small stuff. I struggle with this one, too. It’s easy to get all bent out of shape over something little. Put it into perspective. Place in its context—into the grand scheme of the universe, and you’ll likely find that it’s really not the end of the world. And if it still feels that way, find ways to manage it. Prepare, understand it and work to solve it. 10. Maintain a sense of humor. Maybe this one is the most important, I’m not quite sure. Find the irony in your situations. Joke about the luck, the likelihood, the purpose of this particular instance. You’ll find the tension just melts a way, leaving a collected mindset for direction and solution. Finally, I realize this list is large and means something different to each person. I get that it’s difficult to manage these on a daily basis. Overwhelming you is not the point. This blog is just a reminder to throw these in whenever you are able. You know, like when you toss in extra sprinkles or lick the entire bowl of brownie batter—that extra bonus to your day. That’s how life is, really. You have to choose to make it sweeter and smoother. At some point, we all have to make a decision to be happy. And it’s never a bad idea to add just a bit more sugar. Trust me, I’ve done it.


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