Family Stories: roots for our children

  • By Karen Wilson
  • November 19, 2010
  • 282
                        
“Remember our poodle that hid because people kept laughing at his haircut?” someone asks. “Yeah, he looked like a vulture!” someone else agrees. So begins a familiar tale at Wilson family gatherings. A long gone comical parakeet also brings lots of giggles. One of his favorite antics was lying on his back so he could roll curlers with his feet. Once, he perched on the side of a tall glass of iced tea and tapped the ice with a foot. When he boldly stepped on the seemingly solid ice, he quickly sank to the bottom of the glass. He was quite irritated when he had to be dumped out. Family pranks feature prominently in lots of our stories too. I particularly like the one that involves flying potion, but I’ll leave out the identities of the participants to protect the innocent and the guilty. Many of my grandfather’s stories revolved around the horses in his childhood and using a team for farm work. In one of my favorites, his father tells him to quit reading billboards and drive the team. I guess distracted driving is nothing new. Although I heard many of his stories numerous times, I have forgotten the flavor he put into their telling. Rather than the yarns he spun, I just remember the bare details. We tried several times to get his stories recorded, but it never quite worked out. If we just left a recorder for him, he couldn’t think of anything to say. He needed an audience. If we tried to turn on the recorder once he started talking, he froze. Fortunately, my mother and her sister have taken the time to write many of his stories and their memories of their childhoods with him. Since stories often flow freely during holiday gatherings, it’s a great time to collect and preserve them. If you want to prompt storytelling, try starting with a relatively safe subject like pets. Their stories often involve funny capers and put people in a good mood. Silly kid stories can prove a lot of fun, too. Our sons love to hear about things they did as toddlers. But take caution, your teens and young adults may find the stories more embarrassing than amusing. When you can, get things recorded. For a couple of holidays, my husband just put the video recorder in the corner and let it run. Of course, with this method, you may have to edit later if someone mentions something that they would not want preserved. Alternatively, just make a few quick notes to jog your memory. When you get home, you can put the whole story down on paper. Once you are reminded of it, you will probably be able to include the details from memory. If you think your family would be up for something more formal, recruit a child or teen in the family to interview the older members. Write a list of questions ahead of time to help them keep the stories flowing. Perhaps the interviewer could ask for particular favorites like how his grandparents met or courted. When my grandfather drove up to invite my grandmother- to-be to accompany him on a Sunday drive, she initially refused because she thought he wanted to sell her a car. National Public Radio periodically airs interviews done by Story Corps where family members and friends interview each other about significant events in their lives. Something similar could work for your family too. With some coordination, all kinds of things are possible. Arrange to have people bring photos to exchange or copies of stories. Gather around a table to make scrapbook pages. Make photo copies of old family photographs to share. Collect and copy letters and journals of family ancestors. Scan everything onto a computer and distribute digital copies. Family stories are all too easily lost. And, perhaps, some happenings are better to let go than to retain, but stories give our children roots from which to grow. It’s worth a little holiday time to tell them.


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