Weddings May Be Expensive – Marriage is Priceless
Whether youre a real princess or just want to feel like one, theres plenty of life when once the reception is over
I am admitting here and now, I am an unabashed lover of weddings. So you can imagine the recent royal wedding was a high point of my week, even though I didnt manage to roll out of bed until 6 a.m., just in time to see the bride arrive at the altar. Thank goodness for instant replay!
I read a lot of bloggers and assorted posters complain about all the media attention the wedding received, to which I say Id rather watch Will and Kate than Donald Trump making an goof of himself yet again or round 5 of the NFL draft.
Any number of bloggers took exception to the cost of the nuptials and that I can understand. Of course, when your grandma is the Queen of England and your dad is the heir apparent Prince of Wales, you have to think the wedding is going to be a blow out. Of course, it was nice of the brides family to pitch in. But hey, when youre extremely wealthy, throwing an extremely expensive wedding is part and parcel of your life.
And of course, nearly everyone in Great Britain took the day off to celebrate, so whos going to complain about that. Cmon wasnt it us Yanks who invented the three-day weekend? Like it or not, this country loves a good spectacle – from the Super Bowl to the Inaugural to New Years Eve. And those events cost money and in many cases, we foot the bill. So dont go wagging your finger at the Mother Country.
So, I was driving up Beall Avenue on Saturday after The Wedding when I see the front doors of St. Marys flung open and the receiving line set up. Since Ive already admitted I love a good wedding, I circled the block just to glimpse the happy couple. Indeed, out came the guests – suitably attired for an American afternoon wedding (though I still pray for the return of the hat!) – and the bridal party.
And everyone was happy (it least they looked to be – its hard to tell during the cycle of one red light). And I imagine they all took off for the reception and by the time this column hits print the couple will either be returning from a honeymoon or thinking about thank you notes. No Cartier tiara, no balcony kiss, no Elton John – but still you get the idea.
So, heres what troubles even a nuptialaphile like myself: the price tag. As I already said, when your grandma and dad both live in palaces, a big wedding is sort of a rite of passage. With people whining about that cost, consider this: the average cost for both a non-royal American or British wedding is about the same: around $25,000.
This information – from several wedding sites – surely is enough to make me glad my child is a male. For my friends with multiple daughters – you have my sympathies.
Now remember, thats an average: Will and Kate probably broke the curve for Britain and my guess is the couple I saw probably had a most cost-conscious affair.
Why? Well, I guess because every little girl wants to be a princess for a day and she and her parents want a memorable event. My parents got married in a little Methodist church in Newark, Ohio with a cake-and-punch reception in the church basement. I think my grandmothers may have gotten married in their homes. A friend of mine went to the county courthouse over lunch and wet back to work afterwards.
And you know what? At the end of the day, they were all equally married.
It seems incredible to spend so much money for an event that goes by in a flash. A friend of mine was concerned about how her wedding program looked. We dont care, I said on behalf of the guests. Were either going to throw it away or take it home and stick it in the drawer.
Brutally honest? Yes. True? Also yes.
This brings to me to the sad story of a former co-worker of mine, desperate to be a bride. Found the guy. Got the ring. Spent a year driving everyone nuts with every detail of the wedding and reception. One day, she asked me, Do you think Im too young to get married?
Yes, I said, without hesitating.
Hmm, she replied, before sticking her head back into a catalog of bridesmaids dresses.
Her wedding was a lovely event. Id been to worse; Id been to better. I was home by 9 p.m.
Not even three months later, she and her husband split up. So much for the gown, the musicians, the cake, the wedding planner.
Later, she said she just wasnt ready to be married. Ready to be a bride, not ready to be a wife.
A wedding is a one-day event. And, unless youre royalty, its pretty short and not re-run on major television networks.
Marriage is forever, if the vows are to be believed. Many marriages dont make it out of infancy some last and last and last. The difference is not the money you spend, the number of bridesmaids you have or how many courses you serve at dinner. A happy marriage is something money cant buy – not even if your grandma is the queen of England.
Wooster Weekly News columnist Tami Lange can be reached via e-mail at tam108@hotmail.com
