Remembering at Christmas

  • by Jennifer Kneuss
  • December 15, 2011
  • 364
                        
Summary: Christmas brings tender memories of days with dear ones, and those memories may be more agonizing than comforting for those who are keenly feeling the loss of someone they love. Community Hospice of Tuscarawas County is available to help. Christmas is a time of sleigh bells and snowflakes, gifts and giving, and time with family and friends. However, for those who have lost someone they love during the past year, the memories of Christmas past can bring deep pain. . “It doesn’t get any easier,” quietly admitted Elena Littleton, who is spending her second Christmas without her husband, Vernon, who passed away suddenly on Nov. 7, 2010. “My friends are part of my support system, but my faith in God, that’s what keeps me going.” Littleton and several of her friends attended the Candlelight Memorial Service, hosted by the non-profit, local Community Hospice of Tuscarawas County on Dec. 13 in New Philadelphia. The evening featured music, scripture, poetry, and lighting of memorial candles. “It gets better, but it never goes away,” commented Littleton’s friend Geri Newell. She has been a widow for 11 years, and, like Littleton, also serves as a Hospice volunteer. Hospice social worker Marti Massello noted that Tuscarawas County’s Hospice has about 70 clients at any one time. “It takes a lot of courage to come out and do this, and it is heart wrenching, but it is the first step toward healing. Around Christmas time, you are always struck with those memories that are good, and as soon as you remember those, you think of the person you have lost. It’s like sticking your finger in an electric socket,” Massello said. “You don’t know what to do. As far as holding on to the memories and enjoying the season, you are stuck with all those memories. I just encourage people to allow that to flow. It just happens.” Hospice pastor Brian Flood has been with the organization for over six years, ministering to families. “This Christmas memorial service started out years ago as part of the Angel Tree project, then three or four years ago we created this service of remembrance for everyone; not just our Hospice patients’ families, but for anyone in the community who would like to remember,” Flood said. “I know this time of year is often a hard time for them, as they reflect and remember.” During the service, the pastor gently addressed those gathered. “You have permission to grieve. Your loss is significant,” he said. “Also, the traditions of the holidays may change. It is ok to keep old traditions, but also ok to create new ones.” The Community Hospice program provides doctors, nurses, home health aides, social workers, a bereavement counselor and other staff, support groups, and volunteers that help Hospice families in a myriad of ways, around the clock as needed. Unlike for-profit hospice corporations, all services of Community Hospice of Tuscarawas County are provided without the family ever being asked to pay anything, a promise they are able to keep to because of the outpouring of financial and volunteer support from the community. Staff member Maureen Grady encouraged those grieving to reach out. “Some of these people lost their loved ones in the beginning of the year, and you see a lot of support right then and there, but then weeks or months later, they still have that support with us, and we are there with them every step of the way,” Grady stated. “I think, especially around the holidays, that this service is not only a wonderful time for the family and friends to come to celebrate the lives of those we’ve lost, but also for the staff, to let the family know that we are still here, and are still thinking of them. It’s a very difficult time for people, and we want them to know they are still in our thoughts and prayers.” Community Hospice of Tuscarawas County is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year for individuals and families facing the end of life journey. More information can be found at www.myhospice.org, or calling the Dover office at 330-343-7605. A listening ear and compassionate care are just a phone call away.


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