The third Sunday in June we celebrate Father’s Day
- Scott Daniels: We Ate Well and Cheaply
- June 15, 2024
- 1162
There’s little agreement on the origins of Father’s Day, with two versions generally tossed around. One comes from the state of Washington, where the daughter of a widowed father with six children thought her dad and other fathers like him should be recognized along with moms for their sacrifices and care.
The other chief story of the beginning of Father’s Day has a West Virginia girl wanting to honor fathers after many were killed in a mining accident near her home. These were around the turn of the 20th century. Father’s Day was an unofficial thing until Lyndon Johnson named the date and Richard Nixon made it a federal holiday in 1972.
The third Sunday in June, we honor the fathers of the nation. Other countries have their Father’s Day too, on different dates.
Mother’s Day is a little easier to navigate. Generally, we get Mom flowers, take her to brunch and spend a little time with her. Fathers are a little touchier breed. I suspect many are of a dual mind: uncomfortable at being fussed over but also secretly wanting to be made a fuss over just a little.
I’ve fathered six children; three are still alive at 31, 27 and 3. We tend to think of ourselves as insulated from such loss in our time, but we aren’t. I’m very grateful for all three, though they obviously have busy adult lives now.
Thank goodness for texting so we can stay in touch. I think one of the greatest things about living here in the future is the explosion of photography for just about every family.
From my childhood there are not many pictures remaining. There I am at the beach in my new Christmas pajamas and in the backyard inflatable pool. I think I have taken more pictures of my young son this month than were taken in the whole of my growing-up years. He will be able to look at thousands of images and watch every detail of his life unfold day by day. Every milestone, every new pair of shoes, every swoosh down the slide, it’s all there. I wish there were some way to transfer the big heart squeeze I get from those moments into the pictures so he could feel that too.
Some years ago when my marriage was ending and my then young daughters were enduring all the awful things children in such situations must, they gave me a magnificent Father’s Day. They spent time with me on that day when I was feeling quite low and pointless and cheered me with perfect gifts. They each got a box of my favorite cereal and wrapped it in newspaper with a ribbon. It may have been a case of casting about last minute for something to give me, but the humor and the thought perked me up. That was a good Father’s Day.
Now I’m in the class of not wanting any fuss. The gift of children is the precious thing, and God has filled my cup to the runneth over part. Father’s Day may be barbecue in the backyard and a case of favorite beer or a day of movies and snacks. Or it may be just a phone call from one part of the country to another to say hello. It really doesn’t matter what it is.
Most fathers, and without question mothers, can sit quietly with their thoughts on those honoring days, if just for a moment, and give thanks for being able to watch new people be born, grow, learn and thrive. Honoring our experience as parents from within our own hearts means as much as feeling remembered by the kids.
When I was 20 and an idiot, I didn’t think I wanted children. Thank God no one listened.